Let's take it back to the time before social media, before cell phones and before the "hook-up" culture. Let's think of our favorite romantic comedy and think how hard the guy works to get the girl. And finally, let's think of how much has changed since our parent's time - our grandparent's time. What happened..? When did a heart-eye emoji on an Instagram picture replace actually telling someone you liked them? Why is "sliding into your DM's" how you get the girl now?
As a hopeless romantic - for literally everyone in the world but herself - I am a sucker for all and any Nicholas Sparks movie. But as I sit there and watch them over and over (and over and over again), it's such a sad realization that this generation doesn't believe in love anymore. Love really doesn't exist; or it does until something better comes along. In "The Notebook," Noah wrote Allie a letter every single day for a year and here I am, *patiently* waiting for a text back.
I miss when "swiping right" wasn't actually a thing and people weren't afraid to "catch feelings." When did being "emotionally unavailable" become such a positive attribute for a person? This generation is spiraling out of control and soon, dating will be extinct. But unfortunately, we live in a time where we want instant gratification. Dating takes too long; the process is long and exhausting and people, today, just don't want that so in turn, it's easier to swipe right. Thus Generation-Y created the mythical land of the "hook-up" culture - where feelings don't exist and sex is literally at our fingertips. Great, right? No commitment, no feelings, no awkward pauses when one person has no idea what to say. Absolutely not. Yet we accept it; we welcome it with open arms and think it's okay to live like this. And then we complain that chivalry is dead. It doesn't make sense.
But who is really to blame? Well, ourselves. We created this stigma that having feelings for someone is entirely wrong and shouldn't happen. We created a world where it's easier to just have sex with someone and never talk to them again for that instant gratification we crave. We convince ourselves that we're okay with the world we created and that we are happy with just jumping from hook-up to hook-up. The idea of the hook-up culture captivated us, quickly at that, and we forgot how to date; how to get to know someone without just looking at their pictures on Tinder. We have forgotten how to fall in love with someone.
It's not to late to change back to how it once was; how it is the movies. We have to remind ourselves that it's not a bad thing to have feelings. We have to stop being selfish and start caring more about other people and not just trying to get their clothes off. Delete Tinder and Bumble and actually go out there and start a conversation with someone. Learn what they like, what they don't like, what makes them smile, cry, laugh, mad - ANY thing about them. If you find someone attractive, talk to them instead of silently stalking them from afar or on social media. We have to get back to the idea of intimacy in its true form and remind ourselves that it is not just taking our clothes off for anyone. We have to realize that a like on Instagram or a risky snapchat isn't all there is in getting the girl/guy. And it's possible, I promise.
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